Awkward Situation Aficionados Pillows

"Diane, this is Karen, an old war buddy of mine."

"Don't let my parents get to you—they hate everyone I bring home."

"Undress down to your underwear and have a seat. The optometrist will be in shortly."

'Do you think maybe it's not a good idea to wear a red plaid sports coat to a funeral?' 'It is if it's the only sports coat you've got left that fits. I'll just try to look extra somber.'

Dr. Miska: Eye, Ear, Nose and Embarrassing Bodily Functions.

"I was a lot happier with the elephant in the room."

Bad Interview Technique

"If you think the first half of this psychological test is intrusive, wait until you're grilled by me mother."

"Ignore the screams, sir. I'll get a new fork."

"It's not what you think."

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

"Ah guys, before you push any buttons can I just check my calculator?"

A close encounter of the awkward kind

Spinach Dating.

"Let’s try another one. Jerry blinked, Kate’s giving Jon the finger, and Jess is choking."

"So, have you two been doing anything reproductive?"

Shy Man at Party

'See, I told you my dad would like you.'

"Michael. ... That's my sleazeball of an ex-husband's name."

'Excuse me, Mr. Pavlik, but that gentleman you called an idiot is here. Should I still say you're not in?'

"Look, I know Estella has a boyfriend. I would never try to break them up. But it's not illegal to text friends...and we're still friends..."

Lion Toupee

"Mum, Dad, where was I downloaded from?"

'I hope I'm not intruding...'

'Now that's what I call a worthy cause.'

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: Alumnae News

"I could see my mating dance had caught her eye, so I put more energy into it, but I ended up sweaty and out of breath: she lost interest then. . ."

Gavin was keen to make a good impression on his first day at work.

'Oh no! I think I left my wallet in the examination room.'

'Check this out Henry, the stripper has arrived.'

"Did I just butt-dial my booty call?"

Dating Disasters: It's your first date and it's Valentine's Day - "Mmm-mmm! These are some dang fine ribs. Ain't you gonna eat yers?"

''Change your underwear.' Hmm, my mother must be in town for a visit.'

'I can't play any tunes, it's just used for hiding my farts after dinner.'

"Flash went off" support group