Awkward Situation Aficionado Pillows

'Today's unwilling nude model is Ralph.'

"I have a rather big favour to ask."

'It's a guest tooth brush!!! You're not the only guest we've ever had, Dale!'

"It's bad enough when someone give you a card who you didn't... but worse when it's a musical card!"

Bad Interview Technique

'Ah, now this is awkward. Do you have a pen I could borrow?'

"Let me start off by saying this: I called you in here by mistake and now I want you to leave."

"Maybe I could meet you after work."

"Hell, I'm from the dating agency. Can I move in with you."

"She realised the date was going badly when he suggested they split the bill."

'Funnily enough, I always seem to get a spare seat beside me on the bus.'

'Better than looking at four walls is here.'

Can I just give you the stool sample you asked for yesterday!

'I hope I'm not intruding...'

'Anyone can arrange a blind date, only truly great ones can arrange a whole relationship.'

"I'm ready for the debriefing."

'I'm sorry to be the one to tell you, Mrs Smith, but your son wasn't only not wearing clean underwear, he had NO underwear period!'

"Hello, my car broke down and I was wondering if I could use your Porn Hub?"

"She's in the bathroom, enjoying our new Japanese toilet."

"I'm sorry, Mr. Jenkins doesn't like you."

"I was a lot happier with the elephant in the room."

"If you think the first half of this psychological test is intrusive, wait until you're grilled by me mother."

Time management office worker

"Ignore the screams, sir. I'll get a new fork."

"It's not what you think."

Top Ten Elevator Hits of All Time

Chatty, garlic-coffee breath, apathetic, contagious

"And with that being said Polly became dinner." "Polly wanna cracker?" "Polly wanna piece of yo mama's sweet behind." "Oh boy..."

A close encounter of the awkward kind

"Ah guys, before you push any buttons can I just check my calculator?"

"Let’s try another one. Jerry blinked, Kate’s giving Jon the finger, and Jess is choking."

"It's an adjustment being a handshake guy in a fist-bump company."

Spinach Dating.

'Don't you hate people who blatantly use office parties to network?'

"Michael. ... That's my sleazeball of an ex-husband's name."