Messiness Enthusiast Pillows

"Perhaps it was wrong to say 'May our company become a home to you'..."

'I can't get into my room because of all the clothes, books and C.Ds piled up against the door, so we have to go in this way.'

"Do you want African white-backed vultures? Because this is how you're gonna get African white-backed vultures."

"I thought you said that he was house trained!"

'My husband is a police detective. He does know how to toss a room.'

A Vase has fallen on a cat's head. Are mice to blame?

'Look behind you. . . Just kidding.'

'I'm just exercising my first amendment rights.'

'I'm a perfect little angel while I'm asleep. It's being awake that causes me trouble.'

"C'mon. Get out there and go tinkle already."

'You could say this is how my husband and I support local arts.'

'This is going to be good, he's taking water balloons into the board meeting.'

"I just love candle-lit dinners."

"And they say WE have a shedding problem!"

'The sleepover was great Mum: Timmy's house is a pigsty just like ours...'

'You're a filthy pig, Gordon! I guess that's why I love you so much.'

'How do people without a middle name know when the're in trouble?'

'How do I know your ours?'

'You're honoured, Mr. Coombes - He won't do that for just anyone!'

"At least she got it to squeak when she tripped over it."

"It feeds blood to our brains...and that makes us smarter!"

'I'm all about quantity.'

"Doreen, the cat's after the parrot again!"

Restroom Practical Joke.

"You threw the wrench again, didn't you?"

"One checker, two packs of cigarettes, two screws, one teapot bird, one piece of coal, three lighters, one Christmas light, one clove of garlic, four boxes of matches, two books, three pieces of broken dish, eggshells, one saltshaker peg, one pen, one cre

'You have to clean it yourself. There is no delete key.'

"My decorating style is more like 'Flung Shui'."

'We were mud wrestling.'

"Mom is pretty certain I'm on my third guardian angel by now."

'Cleanliness may be next to godliness, but with Jimmy it's next to impossible.'

'What do you expect Marjorie, I am a grub.'

"Instead of cleaning my room, can we just seal the door and call it a time capsule?"

'As near as I can figure something bad happened and they're both in on it.'

"No, it's not burglars dear, it's only Samantha looking for the chocolate biscuits!"