Message Juggling Master Gifts

'You have seven phone messages telling you to check your e-mail, and thirteen e-mails telling you to answer your phone.'

'You see, Brad, I'm not just a highly polished career woman.'

Multi-tasking.

"Force quit! Force quit! Force quit!!"

"Pay more attention to me? I'm sorry, dear, but Mommy needs you to be more specific."

We're looking for someone who knows how to adapt, not adopt.

Barack Obama's To Do list.

'Technically, I was making fun of your writing ability.'

Food deliverer's baby.

"Hi, you've reached Susan's desk. I am monotasking right now, so I'll call you back it's the phone's turn again. Beep!"

"I was downgraded to junk status at work today."

'To cut back on traveling expenses, we're going to start sending you out as an e-mail attachment.'

'Sorry I'm late getting home from work, I overslept.'

Hassled Mother.

Spam in inbox.

"I'm the last to go home because my parents are still fine tuning their work-life balance."

The Housewife

'Look! It's superwoman...and all her assistants!'

"The trouble with spelling rules is that they impede creativity."

Overworked

"Hello?"

The Communicator

A mother drives a mini-van full of kids; her bumper sticker reads "I'd rather be working".

'Good to see you back at work.'

'As editor, your first job will be to rewrite your resume.'

'Looks like someone got their bags mixed up at daycare drop-off.'

"Finally. The baby's asleep, the washing's done, I've finished cleaning the house..."

'Jack, you're being way too entertaining. This is supposed to be a bored meeting.'

"I was just ringing to see if you got the e-mail about the letter I sent you?"

'I juggle a family, a career, and three cell phones.'

'Who's gonna tell her she's wearing two different shoes?'

Rocking Chairs

'Let me put this in dog terms: Woof! Woof! Bark! Bark! Bow-wow-wow!'

'Needs more challenge.'