Memorial Mystery Fan Gifts

"I didn't know the invisible man came from here!"

He looks so natural lying there...

"Play 'Misty' for me."

Monument in the park for Squirrel Feeder

'The good news is that it's not your fault.'

Veterans Day '20

'And in local news: Someone is hiding behind the drapes.'

Dog detectives

"Undiagnosed serial killer"

Nancy Drew Mysteries - The Later Years

Helicopter tour guide: 'And THERE they are folks! The mysterious ancient stone figures of Easter Island!'

"Sure. I know of a haystack on the edge of town where you'll be safe until the heat dies down."

They were long past their canine pasts, but the rare stamp brought out the beast in them.

"Another clear case of COVID19."

"You're sure it's a birthmark?"

"This patient must be really rich! He brought back the most extravagant illnesses from exotic holiday spots."

'He's been shot!'

'I was a substitute teacher. Former students still approach me to thank me for everything I let them get away with.'

"Well, obviously the victim had a French enemy."

'Golfers rowing a viking longboat.'

"We'd like to start out being very involved with you but eventually be drawn away to much more interesting cases down the hall."

'I don't know what happened. One minute she's spooning me. The next minute I'm knifing her.'

At Mary Higgins Clark's book club.

'I don't think the killer would in the garden...that'd be waaaay too obvious.'

'First Lady Lettuce goes missing...'

The first Da Vinci Code. Dude, where there's a sock on the doorknob, it means I've got a model in here!

War HeroWar Exit Strategy Hero.

'Don Francesco, scusi... But while we were burying Luigi, some joggers ran into us... So we had to bury five corpses altogether...'

The farmer says one of his cows are missing, mind if we take a look around

'The paintings are neolithic, I suspect the Mustaches wee added by a later people.'

The big break in the case of the missing French Fries: 'But just to make sure, can you have each of them squawk.'

Recollections of a Retired Butler

Police are searching for a male between 16 and 25 years, with a silky sheer taupe complexion and a run over his left eye.

'The GOOD news is that the medication you took has completely cleared up your hardening of the arteries.'

"Everyone is so cynical these days."