Melody Rejecter Pillows

Throwing Away Music

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

"We have a song, but neither of us can remember it."

Tonight: Wagner's Ring Tone Cycle.

'You can't fire me! -- This is a right-to-work state!'

Dermatology: Journal of Itchcraft.

Pianist-boxer

"The piano's in tune, but the house is a little flat."

Turkey going away for Christmas.

A dog banging a snare drum.

'You'll marry me? Really? Then forget it! I can't be with someone who's standards are that low!'

Mr. Chester's diplomacy

"I can't stand reality. What makes you think I'll enjoy it virtually?"

"Arithmetic doesn't agree with me."

A bird tweets along with a musician.

"The following program contains adult situations designed to make you feel bad about your life."

"Sorry, but she says she's not interested. She just wants to play the field."

"Will you stop doing that please? Isn't it obvious to you that I just don't fancy him?!"

"We're not celebrities, and we don't want to get out of here..."

For the last time, yes, he's still following you.

"According to this, couples who read in bed together are happier. It doesn't say anything about the harmonica."

Music theft.

"I don't know 'where I've been all of your life', but wherever it was, I wish I was there now!"

'How elaborate. Most women who don't want to go out with me just say no.'

Please giver generously violin to buy.

'Hi, didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?'

". . . If a girl throws your prospectus in the trash, she's not the girl for you."

"Sorry, I'm not into heavy metal."

"No, I don't want to do it 'neath the tree."

'If there's a pool, we're not interested: We would never use it!'

"Yes, I am watching reality shows, but not because I like them. They're so repulsive, they make me lose my appetite. I've lost a ton of weight."

"Phil had no idea what he was talking about."

"The short answer is no. The long answer is noooooooooooooo."

Would you like to go out on a date? - 'No.' - 'Oh... are you already seeing someone?' - 'No.' - 'I don't get it...' -