Medieval Streamers Gifts

Cord cutter

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

Frontispiece to the first volume of 'Master Humphrey's Clock'

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

"We're following Carrot Top."

'Of all the nerve!...Making us sit through the whole of their Bayeux Tapestries!!'

Society for the preservation of dragons - "You don't want them to become extinct do you."

Knight feeding his kids.

"Take this declaration of war and punch it up."

"well done rescuing my son. Now, your final task is to quietly transfer the baby to the cradle upstairs, without waking him."

Servant brings king skateboard on pillow.

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"He's his own worst enemy."

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

"The peasants are revolting Sire."

'Isn't it cute the way they compete so hard?'

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

TV jester.

"When I ask questions, I expect answers!"

"If you let down your guard, I'll walk over the moat."

"Early model of baggage claim"

"The knights of the round accent table"

"If they want a snowball fight, then I'll give them one."

Joust Sharpener

Hildegard von Bingen

"Oh great, the printer is down."

underwater knight

Wouldn't it be cool if we could live in the Middle Ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords. We could hang out in taverns and drink ale, maybe earn enough coin to hire a hero … Then we could go on a quest. Maybe slay some golems. I think it's a real sign of intellectual maturity that we haven't even mentioned maidens yet. Real Middle-Ages maidens would eat you for breakfast.

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

'When I met him he was all bright and shiny - now he's a rust bucket.'

In case of emergency - use tin opener...

Sir gawain had been duped....it was a damson in distress

'He's been brought in to save the company.'