Medieval Mixer Gifts

"That's the Press Corps Hospitality Tent. We had better get tooled up and make a start."

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

'Don't look at me like that! You're the one who wanted to live in a bouncy castle!'

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

Man is caught swimming on an inflable float in a moat by the knights.

"Where did you say you went to culinary school?"

'I'm afraid it's Daddy you have to impress-he's a RSPCA inspector!'

"Is that neat whisky?"

'..and one for the pot.'

Old songs made new

"And now, Bach's Brandenburg Congerto Number One, first movement."

'This is taking forever. We should've just microwaved it.'

Competitors complained that Sir Hops-A-Lot's souther steed gave him an unfair advantage."

"All I've got left is smoked."

"Sooo....my wife and I saw you from across the bar."

"Sir George! How did it go with your jousting competition at the Renaissance Fair?"

'You can't pour the boiling oil over them yet - I'm still cooking the chips !'

"Ah-sod it! I think I'll get a takeaway instead..."

"Bloody Cyclops!"

Jester

Humpty Dumpty is sitting on a wall, Below is a man with a boiling pot waiting for him to land in it, Man is licking is lips, he has napkin on and is holding a knife and fork,

Santa's close call with the Cow Jumping over the Moon.

'I'm not eating it, not if it's been genetically modified.'

No caption. (Friar wears a cross and the chord leads to his ears as it does with a MP3 player.)

Dragon roasts a chicken impaled on a knight's sword.

Beethoven's 10th

"Um...David, a word if we may."

Nasdaq, Meshach and Abednego

Witching Hour

Magic Potion Micro-Brewers

"... And would sir like a straw with that?"

Vampire Cocktail.

"He likes music and he likes comedy, but he hates musical comedies."

Knight on horse approaches a pole vault.

Forget the potions. This Halloween I'm working on a vaccine.