Mystical Mixer Gifts

Happy Halloween

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"Everything on our menu uses organic, locally sourced, graveyard-to-table ingredients."

'I feel cosmopolitan tonight, Joe - Give me a scotch with an irish Chaser.'

"Where did you say you went to culinary school?"

The eye of newt - Is it gluten-free?

Bloke orders a pizza as Jesus divides the loafs and fishes

'..and one for the pot.'

"Are you sure? It doesn't look like a diet pill!"

"And now, Bach's Brandenburg Congerto Number One, first movement."

'Really, Bob, the Wine Fairy?'

"That's the Press Corps Hospitality Tent. We had better get tooled up and make a start."

'This is taking forever. We should've just microwaved it.'

"Sooo....my wife and I saw you from across the bar."

"What the hell was in that?!"

Magic Potion Micro-Brewers

"Bloody Cyclops!"

'The cauldron is just for the sauce - I do the rest in my microwave.'

Wow. That WAS a lot faster.

"Ah-sod it! I think I'll get a takeaway instead..."

'Are you going to bowl or are you going to peek into the future?'

Santa's close call with the Cow Jumping over the Moon.

'I'm not eating it, not if it's been genetically modified.'

'We'll be right back after these important messages.'

Beethoven's 10th

'What would Nostradamus do?'

"Um...David, a word if we may."

Witching Hour

"I don't like hearing happy stories."

Magic Potion Micro-Brewers

THE WILKINSON SWORD AND THE STONE

'Eye of newt, toe of frog, ear of bat and tongue of dog - everything but bloody coffee!'

Forget the potions. This Halloween I'm working on a vaccine.

Recently discovered music compositions: Mozart's quartet for harpsichord, viola, banjo and ghetto blaster.

Ice pack for the heart.