Medical Professionals With A Sense Of Humor Gifts

"Orthopaedic Surgeon are we? Well, you'll enjoy our spare ribs as starters followed by a main course of either Leg of Lamb, Shoulder of Pork, or Neck Chops."

Medical Building Directory: Dr. Larry Nix, Dr. Sally Putty, etc..

'You have a strawberry on your nose, I'll give you some cream to put on it!'

The obstetrician doesn't need a close catcher...

"I'm putting you on a beef diet. Nothing beef for breakfast, nothing beef for lunch, nothing beef for tea, nothing beef for..."

'The doctor will acknowlege your existance now.'

"I'll be fielding any questions you may have and my assistant, Carol, will be googling the answer."

"Heart transplant surgery waiting room"

"Right here is your baby’s infrastructure, and in a month or so we’ll be able to see the analytics."

"I like when we get organ transplants from New York because they always throw in a dozen bagels."

Dermatologist reading a 'Journal of Itchcraft'.

"When you're ready, I'm going to stand on my hind legs, and lick it better."

9 out of 10 doctors recommend keeping their stethoscopes in the freezer.

'Are you writing my symptoms, or is that your autobiography?'

Fly Hospital: "Just a slight stinging then you'll be fast asleep."

Locum GP's to be paid for extra work on the BMA agreement

Eye, ear, nose, throat and loans to pay the bills.

'I hope you all appreciate the irony in this.'

Doctor to patient: 'I won't be asking about your three marriages. This isn't an invasive procedure.'

Surgery Instructions.

"Doctors, Gilby, Beam and Henson. Ears, nose and throat."

Fish swimming around inside drip.

'Geoffrey's Tourette's is acting up.'

NHS Efficiency Drive

"When they develop their own gravitational field it's a clear warning sign of getting type 2 diabetes."

"They used to call them G.P.s."

"Yikes! Okay, I'm going to pretend I didn't see this."

"It's inoperable and perennial."

"Definitely work-related."

"I only came in to get my eyes done."

'Maybe we shouldn't have used the tail as the donor site for a skin graft.'

"I'm not going to lie. This looks pretty serious."

"It happened either over the weekend or when I left the office today for lunch."

"He's very good. He disected my first husband."

"If you don't feel better in a few days give me a call and I'll completely ignore you."