Medical Bill Detective Gifts

'When you have your health, you have everything except money to pay for healthcare.'

Invoice: 'That's good laughter is the best medicine.'

'You may have an adverse reaction when I administer this. It's your medical bill.'

We charge $500 for every nook and $1,200 for every cranny during diagnosis.

"I forget. If I have an adverse reaction, do I call my doctor or my lawyer?"

"If it's an expensive surgery, we now implant a GPS tracking device for the hospital's collections department."

'Serves you right, just tearing open the charge card bill and reading it like that!!'

John Snow

"The initial test results are in and you have excellent coverage."

Medical Billing & Coding

"Parts and labor?"

'It has nothing to do with relativity. He's trying to figure out his cable bill.'

'We're moving you from intensive care to intensive billing.'

'The biopsy is tiny, but it will cost you an arm and a leg.'

"I told you we were being stitched up. This consultant's bills are outrageous."

'The good news is that you'll be able to continue working and pay my bill.'

"Why couldn't you open that wide during the procedure?"

"You'll be out of here before you know it. Our auditor just went over your financial situation."

Doctor getting ready to give lady an injection...

"Well, you helped me with my initial health issue, but now I've got headaches from dealing with billing and insurance!"

"Doctor Wilson believes in preventive financing, so regardless of your insurance, fill out this loan application form."

Yes, I do think second opinions can be worthwhile, but not from 'Evonica, All-Knowing Mystical Seer and Soothsayer'!

'His insurance company said it does not cover self-inflicted accidents.'

"Oh, the doctor does keep up. He gets accounting magazines on the latest billing methods."

"It's elective surgery. Shouldn't I get a discount for the time you save not dealing with insurance forms?"

"The doctor will bill you now."

"I have good news if you have insurance. Bad news, if you don't."

"Freddy, take this back and add it up again. I was your maths teacher, remember."

"I can't wait until we convert to electronic health records. Carry these is giving me backache."

"Of course it's hard to understand. They wouldn't be billing 'codes' , if they were easy to decipher."

'How come routine care breeds intensive billing?'

"Alrighty, let's work out that copay."

'Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it still remains so popular?'

"Reimbursements are still shrinking - billing sent us the latest payment to read."

Winter Weather Forecast: Wicked Cold....with sudden warm spells.