Media Executives Gifts

"Today on Sunday Hot Takes: who will be this week's big sexual harasser?"

Trial by Media

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

Squeezing the Free Press.

"Worst case of month-end burnout I ever saw."

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

Apart from your mother, who else thinks you're doing a good job as Chairman of the company?

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

"Well, how do things look from where you sit?"

Royal Mail boss to become ITV boss.

'You think I'm crazy; I think you're crazy...finally some common ground!'

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

"I hate performance review season."

'If only every year was an election year.'

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

BBC - Crisis Management, Damage Control and Liability Supervision.

Gay Times...

"The meeting will last until lunch, or hell freezes over, whichever is longer."

If nobody had invented graphics

'I went to my boss and demanded the fruits of my labor. He gave me a Blackberry.'

"Now we move over to the sports desk."

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

My brilliant career

"I love it when you use your 'All Things Considered' voice."

News Internecine: Murdoch succession battle

"Where we lack in productivity is made up by extremely low employee turnover."

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

Presidential Pooch Meets The Press

"....So called 'fake news' is dangerous to our democracy!"

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'Just think of it -- 'CSI Mayberry,' with Robert DeNiro as Andy and Wesley Snipes as Barney!'

The President Elect approved by 3 out of 4 talk show hosts!

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."