Mature Muse Gifts

'I'm afraid my husband will stop loving me as I get older.' - 'Mine would never do that with me. You know why, don't you. He's an antique dealer.'

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

Wasting away again in Cappuccinoville.

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

"I don't have the lip for saxaphone."

'Hold everything! -- The National Endowment for the Arts changed its mind!'

"If I turn it up I might get out of here quicker!"

Jerry Lordan

"It's time we discuss menopause and climax change."

'Could you tone down the smile just a little?'

Angel playing music

'Have you ever thought about doing a children's book?'

"This next tune is dedicated to my wife, who is currently away on a cruise. I call it, 'The Devil and the Deep Blue Sea'."

Happy Mothers Day

"I'm desperate to have an inner child of my own."

Artist and the artist's model both thinking of the money.

"He never makes it past Stephen’s walk across Sandymount strand."

"...on the avenue..."

'I think it's called RED!'

Brancusi.

Artist studies painting nudes by painting peeled bananas.

'He thinks he's so hot but, personally, I'd rather be artificially inseminated.'

Life drawing class.

"He hasn't the heart to discharge her. She's been with him for years."

'Cleaning goes against entropy and the natural order.'

'Couldn't you at least unbutton your top button?'

Teen Weather

Al, what advice would you give me as I begin my journey on the highway of adulthood? Pull over onto the shoulder and pretend you have engine trouble. With luck, a beautiful female mechanic will stop to help.

"Love the melody. . . but the lyrics need work!"

Artist's model for a painting of Hamlet turns up to the studio with a black eye

Paint charming.

'A cocoon? Boy, he is having a mid-life crisis!'

"It was the best of Starbucks. It was the worst of Starbucks."

"Genesis" "*The King Gus Version"

Sculptor: 'Okay, SMILE!'