Maternal Muses Gifts

'Nanny being congratulated on arrival of new baby'

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

'Honey, I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

"I'd like to get my hands on whoever coined the phrase 'sleeps like a baby'."

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

"Just kick back and enjoy this. These are the nest years of our lives!"

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

Same Day Delivery: "I wish!"

"I told you. . . use your inside miming."

Suffering from Cooties?

Lamb Noise.

'Don't be alarmed if you hear the toilet flush a lot. Since you don't feel well, I thought I'd wash the dishes for you.'

“Dad, I think I’ve finally found Gsus.”

'The doctor said oily fish was good for his brain development.'

Kangaroo - Mum dropping her ice-cream on Joey's head.

"Adopted? It's cute how you think we would've picked you."

'The girls must be feeling better...'

"It's called geometry, Mum."

"Sorry Tina, I won't be able to come over: Joey is finally asleep and I don't dare move..."

"Now I think of Mom whenever it's cold."

"It's a beautiful world out there, just waiting to be discovered. Well, discovered by one of you, the rest will almost certainly die."

"I don't have the lip for saxaphone."

"Listen. Nobody's cuter than anyone else! You're all equally cute!"

'It's no problem, Mom. Samantha just likes to check on my table manners.'

"The good news is...you've one less window to wash."

'He's going to be an estate agent, just like his Dad.'

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

"Then what happened?"

"Instead of taking a bath can I wear a flea collar?"

'We're playing trampoline, mom.'

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."