Mattress Magnate Gifts

'This one's good if you like to toss and turn all night.'

'Make up your mind, folks... King size or Queen size?'

Lord Avariss - Captain of Industry

"Sold his air rights."

"Well, what would YOU like for Christmas?"

"We can't agree on a size."

'Today a ray of hope . . .'

A fat cat in a suit smoking a cigar.

Mattress makers picketing in front of factory are sleepwalking.

"It may well be the root of all evil, but it's also the root of all this."

'Perhaps you'd like to try something a little firmer, madam?'

"It's the Silicon Valley foundation - they want to know if we'll match our grandson's $100 million donation."

Just Married an Oil Baron

"A secure and restful sleep is guaranteed when this mattress is stuffed with your own money."

"You call this a mere bagatelle?"

Giant Sale: 'I said it was simply a misunderstanding.'

Fridge Magnate

'I won't be coming to see you again. I've purchased a therapeutic mattress.'

"Maybe we shouldn't have chosen to buy the super springy mattress!"

The domino effect.

'Frank! Cut that out and get back to work!'

"Firm yet comfortable, with 420 individual spring posture coils to enhance support. Perfect for hiding under."

"I guess you should have read the fine print on that tag before you ripped it off the mattress."

Real Estate Sign - Desperation...

"It's more than just a mattress. It's a great place to rest your weary assets."

'I tried to light my cigar with money once, but the coin just got hot and burned my fingers.'

'Our new owner is a Russian Cosmetics magnate, meet his wife.'

The Squillionaire's Space Race Heats Up

"Today only, Mr. Hardly, when you buy one 737 MAX airliner at our special price, we'll throw in a second 737 MAX absolutely free."

"I drink to forget."