Masked Comedian Gifts

Actually without the mask, I look a lot like Brad Pitt

'No! No more harps! I can't take it anymore.'

"I told you. . . use your inside miming."

'The results of your physical exam are fine, except for your reflexes: They're more 'dog-like' than 'cat-like'.'

Aladdin conjures up a virtual genie.

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil clowns is that good clowns do nothing."

'You sloth and gluttony guys have it easy -- I'm here for envy!'

'Inside Ralph is a comedienne crying to get out.'

Bloke orders a pizza as Jesus divides the loafs and fishes

Ventriloquism For Beginners.

"Oh, sorry—I think I just butt-summoned you."

'Excuse me, would you mind...?'

And what will it be today? The mask of comedy or tragedy?

Roy felt it was important to act out any side effects that a prescription might cause.

'That filet mignon was supposed to be your last meal? Whoops-a-daisy!'

'We just need to increase our collision policy enough to cover the amount of damage to our car from Joy backing into our neighbor's car, rick.'

Pantomimes Are Lousy Painters. . .

I like when they leave something to the imagination.

"Well at least they can't see your lips move."

School of mime has notice on board: 'No talking in class.'

Can You Dance?

'Venison steaks for a year! Now, Mikey will tell you the bad news.'

No Soliciting

"Oh, and one last item, Ernie: The periodic burst of high-pitched, maniacal laughter... is that new?"

Mime Fights: 'I think you broke my jaw!"

"Well, I've been a hot dog, pizza slice, cheeseburger, and popcorn bucket, but no, I don't have any burrito experience."

Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Terrorist Chatter

'Cheer up Mom...They say dead is the new 80.'

"And this model comes with a virtual mother-in-law in the back seat to make it feel authentic."

"You're not really getting this whole mask thing, are you, Bob?"

Take Me Seriously

Clown Car Lane: 10 or More

Zorro repairs his trousers.

"I hope they keep wearing those masks. Then we wouldn't have to see those dopey faces they make when they talk to us."

Marcel disagreed with the judge, but it was a mute point.