Marriage Misadventure Seeker Pillows

'I was cutting the wedding cake, and somehow, the knife ended up in the groom.'

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

"Boy, I hope we never end up like this."

"I'm sure he said to meet him near the cactus."

"Yes dear, you have worked very hard on the garden. Unfortunately though, you've put the compost on the weeds and the weed killer on my best roses."

'There you go again...constantly snagging!'

"We didn't spend much time together when we first got married, so we're making up for lost time. We now have a date night 300 days a year."

'I can't talk to my wife - all she says is `Baaah! Baaah!`!

'I now pronounce you hooked and booked.'

"At least you don't have a needy husband and an angry dog."

"Doc, she and I just don't understand each other any more...it's like we have different operating systems!"

"I once mistakenly thought I was dating someone for a whole month because I couldn't tell his texts were sarcastic."

Welcome to the lower grade concert. We will premiere an avant garde song cycle with unexpected solos, parts of melodies that may seem vaguely familiar and musicians who leave the stage for no apparent reason. Enjoy!

'We tried living together, but that didn't work so we've decided to get married.'

'To be totally honest, our ship of matrimony is taking on water.'

'....Till death do you part, don't say I didn't warn you.'

'Well yes, I did ask for someone with a sense of humor.'

"This guy has no idea what he's doing."

'It's nice to see that some marriages really are made in heaven.'

'Hello Darling, I am on the bed with the window cleaner.'

'I thought the car was amphibious!'

She's a little too friendly.

'No, you can't speak to my husband. He's sitting on the naughty step.'

'I can't let you catch me - you need the exercise more than you need sex!'

'Look, can't you take it in turns to do the daily Sudoku?'

'You forgot our anniversary, but you remember his birthday?'

Though Mary's date puts her to sleep, she's saved by her airbag.

'When you said 'arriving by Amazon' - I thought you meant the bleedin' tickets.'

Geek Todd Jones strikes out with his 3000th wiman to take over third place on the all time geek strikeout list.

Gilligan's Elevator.

Love

A hunter shoots what he thinks is a bird, but turns out to be a big 'm'.

'Well, I heard he was a player.'