Market Inspector Gifts

No street trading.

Sellers and Inspectors in Cuba

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

All Natural Nothing

At the market

Why markets crash.

'Perfect. Do you deliver?'

"He's quick with the birds and bees stuff, but then comes the bulls and the bears..."

"...We've traced your lineage all the way back to a 15th-century East European Count."

'Are you ready for your FISCAL examination?'

Jumping Wall Street.

Hedge Fund: Our 'Swaps' which mimic stocks, were voted #1 derivative of the year!

"Okay, lets see what we have here."

IRS Audit Section

"It only made sense for us to finally merge."

'Mr Rombly has cancelled his appointment. The Dow is up and he's feeling no pain.'

'Due to recent staff cut-backs and consolidations, I'll be handling your death AND your taxes this year!'

"Other folks have to pay taxes, too, Mr. Herndon, so would you please spare us the dramatics!"

The United States' economy deflating.

'Hang on, I've just found another one. It must've fallen down behind the coffee machine.'

"AXP 0.78, AIG 1.12, T 2.63. . ."

"Consumer confidence remains high as long as we keep them distracted buying stuff."

Produce Market. Lots of things are going on with the produce. The tomatoes, as usual, are having a fruit or veggie identity crisis. Though it makes no sense, the apples and oranges are constantly comparing themselves to one another. The plums are happy. Any assignment or position that comes their way is always the best. That potatoes want couches, of course. And the bananas think they should run the market government. Sure, a banana republic!

Tax Collector

IRS agent to professor scrutinizing tax return under microscope: 'Still looking for that tax loophole, professor?'

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'

'Today, stocks rose on the news that the more people have, the more they want.'

"You know, it really wasn’t that bad."

"Let's try to think of something that untold millions of people will buy."

The bailout.

"Market euphoria is at an all time high."

'He's trying to persuade the Inland Revenue that it's a tax haven.'

*=Hotdog

"Well, if it's a fairy story you want, here's a good one that arrived at the office today."

'In conclusion; our major contract expires tomorrow, we have no idea what we want, and no knowledge of the market, It is time to pass this across to the Procurement Team...'