Marine Comedian Gifts

"They're fake, when I get to school I'm telling everyone that I have evolved."

"Just because that last guy you ate was a vegan, you can't say you're on a vegan diet!"

'You can forget the Captain's table-we're not paying that kind of money just to eat with the crew!'

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

"Say Bernie, how come this little guy's been following you around all week?"

"My wife is the queen of misheard lyrics! Listen to her singing carefully next time: it's hilarious..."

Japanese Whaling

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

Well yes, I am a Blue Whale, but that doesn't mean I'm depressed...

Lady to angler whose line is snagged: 'You would manage to get your line caught in the one tree in this entire massive lake.'

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

'The trick to scaring surfers is to only show your dorsal fin when you surface next to them...'

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

'Little is known about these amazing creatures, as there have only been a few live sightings, by giant squid scientists. Despite previous beliefs, they are actually a land animal, as the fins and respiratory system are removable.'

Fish Farm.

'I got one this small.'

"It was an accident! How many times must I apologize?"

Only Percy seemed happy that the Titanic was taking on water.

"We live in the desert. What did you think I meant when I said it'd be a nice day to go boating?"

'Thank goodness you're here!'

"Ah, sweatpants."

"Don't be afraid of sharks. They generally attack only when provoked."

'This is tasty and all, but do you really think this is a great idea considering we have hundreds of teeth?'

So, how are you planning on eating that?

Shipwrecked with an environmentalist.

Fisherman tricks a visitor into thinking a huge buoy is a fishing float for giant fish.

"Isn't it obvious how he got the job? He 'suctioned' up."

'Have you ever wondered how deep the ocean would be without sponges?'

'Well, we've been under a lot of pressure lately.'

"Oh my gosh babe! These cute little otters want us to play with them."

"I live in dread of being mistaken for an undersea energy cable."

Captain Eddie's New Boat: 'First of all, Eddie, most people don't usually lose theah boats...'

"Another impulse purchase?"

Many clowns in rowboat

'Oh no, he's only the Health and Safety Officer.'