Loves Puns Pillows

'I can't help you, it seems you really are npsycuts!'

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

Do it yourself books.

"I see you also took the road less travelled!"

"Think about the honey."

'Sorry Henry, but I'm looking for something a little more permanent.'

'I see adventure in your future. Yes. You're going to be a culinary adventure.'

Carpool lane (a car driving into a long pool).

'Oil painting is fine, but I can't do watercolours, obviously...'

"Most men lead lives of quiet desperation. Frankly, it beats Pandora."

The marketing is out there now. People all know the pizzas are prepared on the premises. So why no customers?

Kind- hearted, nature-loving Jeff built a new improved bird table.

'And in conclusion...'

Tunnel of Accountants: "You've been selected for a random audit."

'I'm writing you a prescription for some people soup.'

"And another thing, it's real cool in the summer!"

Literate Dogs.

"This must be for charging bigger vehicles."

Hotness

'According to his will, Tiddles left the bulk of his estate to himself. Because, he still has eight lives left.'

'In the circumstances, I think we should skip the housewarming party.'

"I washed my kilt last night , now I can't do a fling with it!"

'I collect a different type of oil painting.'

The static electric eel is very rare.

Weather forecast

"You're a gifted writer, although at times you're just too precious."

"I said, ‘I hit on your sister!’"

"Of course you're bored, sweetie. It's the fin de siècle."

'You give me goose bumps!'

"Your four-o'clock is here."

"Waiter, there aren't any flies in my soup!"