Lovers Of Absurdity Gifts

Humans Queue To Use Portable Toilet While Dogs Queue To Use Tree Portable Toilet

Radio interview with mime artist.

Burglary

"That reminds me. We need to pick up some miniature cocktail weenies, and a box of raisins."

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

Tourists and their Pets.

"He was a sea rescue."

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

Extreme Sisyphus

"Now you can send it."

Admit it. We have a drinking problem.

'Because the horned one commands them to, that's how!'

"Squirting flower, squirting flower...."

A convenient attack of swine flu...

'Your Honor, we've decided to go with the inanity defense...'

'I predict that the next big trend will be spontaneous non-existence.'

Operation.

UFO and snowman

Baseball.

Breakfast surreal.

'Miss Jones, take this down.'

'Did anyone hand in a mature stilton last week?'

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

Salome on Settle (also called Maitresse d'Orchestre) - intended for book but suppressed

'Bad as this may look, it's actually the perfect accompaniment with your entree.'

Nun fight at the OK Corral.

'When he drinks too much he starts eating bollocks.'

'I've made a radio using coconuts, salt water, and a trout.'

'Ok, now if everyone could just hold still.'

'Nobody special, but rich enough to build this statue of himself.

PODs Venn Diagram

Magnet at scrapyard

"Yes, but can your philosophical speculations on existence also be relative to why I crossed the road?"

The Bonvoy Age...