Longevity Celebration Gifts

"Congratulations, sir, you've outlived the lot of them!"

37 years in the same position.

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

Dating is so expensive...

'What you seem to be suffering from is longevity.'

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

"Regular service or affected?"

Rock and Roll

"The third little pig is now a menopausal porker. I hate these hairs on my chinny chin chin."

'...I said we've been marooned.'

Things I love about Powell River...

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

Old Karate Master

The Woodstock Medical-Emergency Tent - 1994

"Your press kit said you were lots of fun."

"Well, we did book the Grill Suite I suppose."

"I need something that says, 'Let's party,' but in a fiscally responsible manner."

How to identify the alarming mood swings of male menopause.

"Scientists have extended the life of the fruit fly."

'Great news, Methuselah Tests show you'll live to be 100!'

How are you feeling today? I feel just like a newborn baby. Really? Yes. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.

"That's for staying married for thirty-five years to a difficult woman."

'They were going to get married when they were young, but he kept forgetting the wedding date!'

'What'll it be: rough-and-ready, ready or not, not on your life, or life's a beach?'

"Congratulations! You've told the same joke one thousand times!"

Heaven

Visit Las Vegas! The city that never sleeps' ot even takes a nap!: 'Because of competition, they had to raise the ante!'

"If they give you any trouble, find a good babysitter and go out for the evening."

"Seventy-seven. How about yours."

'Hey, you little punks wouldn't be trying to swamp me, would you?'

"Hope you don't mind—it was his last request."