Literary Genius Fan Gifts

Spike Milligan

Mozart's First Movement - Baby Mozart is sitting on the potty.

"Meet The Author"

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

The Dorrie Decimal System

Blue Stockings

'He likes to power nap.'

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

William Shakespeare sitting at a desk

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

John Bunyan

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

"Hey, it's not all fire and brimstone anymore—one of our nine circles is even smoke-free."

Pets are reading the book 'Animal Farm'.

"Well, we needed the rain."

Don Quixote

Dating an English Major

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

'Well, now we know why Dracula's been getting all the girls lately.'

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

The Proust of Twitter

"Gone with the wind with cats" "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn." "Me neither, who cares—let's take a nap."

'You have to Marvell eh - 'annihalating all that's made to a green thought in a green shade.''

Trilby - 'Je prong!'

Stephen Spender.

"Oh, this old thing?"

'There's no art to the mind's construction on Facebook, Macbeth.'

Sue the Author 3PM

"I don't care if it is itty-bitty. Turn it off!"

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

It was the best of times, it was the wasrtn blanfil trmsl... It was the bnarfy foodel pook. Arghh! Darn reader's block.

What would Charlotte Bronte do, she thought to herself.

'Tarzan interviewing for a position as a corporate lawyer.' An interviewer asks, 'When we go against the gorillas, how can we be sure that you won't forget which side you're representing?'

"It's felt to be his most thought provoking work."

"Barb's such a fast reader."