Lighthearted Moralist Gifts

Lost and Found

PSA Banter.

At the 2021 Religious Games

Daffodil bulbs

'Cycle shop' selling puncture repair kits next door to a 'Sex shop' selling inflatable dolls

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

"At my age, your legs and bowels begin to go."

"Sucker!" / "Stirrer!"

"Let's take in a trial."

Church Parking Space Reserved For Sinner Of The Week

Second-hand Slander and Innuendo £10

'I hear he has a reputation as a loose Canon.'

Surreal Ale Pub.

"His face may be in the gutter, but his bum's looking up at the stars."

'Vacuums!'

"Listen, the first pterodactyl of spring."

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'I see you've been chasing parked cars again. Wanna talk about it?'

Just Survived My 3rd COVID Scare Dance.

'Hey, what's with all this 'God forbid' stuff?'

'I had multiple personalities.'

Religious toilets.

"But Mom said to ask YOU!"

"Great sermon! - When it comes to sin, you sure know what you're talking about!"

'Frankly, I don't remember why I called this meeting.'

"Oh, I don't mind being called 'Reaper', it's the 'Grim' part that gets me...my name is actually Darryl and I'm a pretty happy guy!"

The World Ends Today!: 'Never mind, dear- better luck tomorrow!'

The Invention of the Tea Light

'Any idea where my night vision visor is?'

Jesus the comedian.

Wheels for all purposes.

"I've forgotten your face but I remember your mask."

'Don't feel too badly about your post, I used to work for the News of the World.'