Light Bill Wrangler Gifts

'We can't hold a meeting tonight. Someone forgot to pay the light bill.'

"They've given me the Lion's share of budgetary constraints."

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

"Excuse me, but I believe you are in my seat."

High Riders of the Old West

"I'm afraid he left everything to charity... Oh, I see. I take it your name's Charity?"

'I've got one week to master this program. The boss is threatening to hire an eight year old.'

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

"Will you stop saying 'ouch' every time I cut something out of your budget?"

'I LOVE the smell of cooked books.'

'I bet those are the accident reports.'

'Did you want me, boss?'

Hang on, I need to find an outlet for my phone, computer and coffee maker. Caf

"Ambitions... to finish on the winning side for a change."

"What's the problem Cowboy? Never heard of Cattle Driving before?"

One of the lesser known joys of being a fencing instructor.

"He who controls the Internet controls the world."

Low rates!

"That reminds me, we must sort out your will."

"The $350 we received to stimulate the economy is still missing..."

'I guess I never should have quit the rodeo'

"Hitch up your horse, Tex. It's time for lunch."

'How do you do it? I keep coming up with six.'

"It's broken I'm afraid." "Will I be able to work?" "Depends. What do you do?" "Oh, I'm just a cowpoke for Circle 'Y' Ranch."

"No one is making you do anything you don't want. I'm just saying we're all headed for Dodge City and we think you should come along."

"...and then the heroic young investor managed to capture the evil high interest rate monster and wrestled him down until he was a mere 5.25%!"

"Dad, if you don't know the answer to this algebra question...just say so."

Teacher said the C's she put face up indicate slight improvement.

District Budget Meeting: Asprin

"I never realized how many wires and cords we used. And that's just from my office."

Fun and games with wires.

"If you roped your cowhand by mistake, turn to page 21..."

"He can't bear working on yellow teeth."

"Turns out Mommy's life is one big long report, sweeitie."

'I see the printer is acting up again.'