Library Frequenter Gifts

Reference books - Health & Safety.

"Did you ask for the large print edition?"

Professor McWit, crushed by an avalanche of Philosophy 101 texts, proves again that a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Big Bang Theory.

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

The Dorrie Decimal System

Do your research!

Paranormal A-Z...

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

Woman blowing dust off book 'Desert Romance'

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

'And the cat is due back in 2 weeks.'

'Bring out yer books!'

Library - Political Science section - 'What to do until the spin doctor comes'

'Is that where you keep the banned books?'

Another Bigfoot sighting...

'The definition of OBSOLETE: old fashioned dictionaries.'

'Why Sally, you look so fetching with that stick!'

"Never mind, Harry. Just remember, the 'Saturday Review' loved it."

'Here comes your own personal weekly beer supply, Joe!'

Two Generations of Readers

'I need to read five books this weekend to graduate - any suggestions?'

I want a calendar where every day says here and now

Kid to boy in library: 'Oh, we came at the busiest part of the day ... it's a reading frenzy.'

'I know it's overdue but I've been in Intensive Care.'

Catalogue of little books.

'Have you got the book 'After the end of the world'?'

'Neither a lender nor a borrower be.'

Charles Addams.

The lion statues in front of New York City Library are replaced with spies.