Letter Lover Gifts

'Would we like to join the Class Action Lawsuit-of-the-Month Club?'

'They're words, Billy, assembly required.'

"Sorry about the misunderstanding. Sometimes my G's look like S's."

You're supposed to be man's best friend, but you never call and you never write!

'It's not a prescription. It's a letter from my son in med school that I'm hoping you can decipher.'

"They published my letter about recycling newspapers."

'I just don't get that guy. Sometimes he sits with us... sometimes he doesn't.'

'Take a letter, Miss Jones.'

'Ere what's your game It's been three weeks since you brought me a letter from my girlfriend.'

'When did the first two vowels appear?'

Bulk mail

absolutely no capital letters beyond this point

Don't tell me fibs! I know ou wrote to the Corinthians, and ya wrote to the Romans, bnot to mention to Galatians, but do you write to your mother?

'I think it's a rather important letter!'

Air Mail Only.

"It's from that Alastair Cooke again"

'Gee, I've never had a pen pal before.'

Punch Initials - W

"I didn't get all that stuff after 'Dear Sir'."

'Right here on the box...'self adhesive envelopes'.'

"Mum, the school has signed up for a skunk-outreach initiative, but don't worry, it's only a penpal programme. . ."

"Mom wants me to learn to read, write, and count sheep."

"We regret to inform you that your recent request for sexual congress has been denied."

'Finishing early are we, Higgins?'

Prayers To ZYP, The God Of Postal Service

"Not this time, Y"

Don't get so excited - it's from you. Self-publishers Clearinghouse. I may already be a winner!

"I won the spelling bee because Eddie Scott invented three letters."

Those who say you can make order out of chaos are lousy at anagrams.

'This handy can of mace stops them in their tracks!'

A parcel of postmen

The first dog and US postman on the moon.

Jewish Scrabble

Post Office. Frank you forgot to seal your envelope. The other "zip code."

Open mike night presents Sadie Cohen in "the difference between us."