Lecturn Legend Gifts

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

The Signing of tthe United States Constitution

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

'Boy, the fish are really biting today, aren't they, Fred?'

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

'Never mind inspiration. I need background material on atomic physics.'

Eternal Student.

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.

"Make a lot of money."

Scarcity

"Nervous about this morning's presentation?"

'...And here we have the 'Laugher Curve.''

Saint George and the Drag Queen

Santa, Alien, Easter Bunny and Sasquatch plan the perfect caper.

"Can't you do something more creative than messing around with cupboard doors?"

Unfinished painting of a monster in a lake sits beside the lake with no painter in sight

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

How to deliver a successful presentation.

"Any questions?"

The Elliot Ness monster.

Sphinx cat and mummy mouse

'He was only reaching for his powerpoint presentation pointer.'

The Loch Ness Rowing Team

"I just found a unicorn! Apparently, they just want to be left alone."

'So what are you studying, young man?'

Another Bigfoot sighting...