Lectern Lover Gifts

"Oh no Henry - Not Another one of your proclamations!"

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

"After years of cartoon rejections, Bill stooped to trying a little shameless product placement."

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

"I don't care about the rating on Goodreads. We're reading Cinderella!"

'I didn't dedicate my book, A Lifetime of Wine Tasting, to my 3 ex-wives and nine kids, because they made it possible. I did it because they made it necessary.'

'No doubt about it Captain. See these markings? This arrow belongs to Robin Hood!'

Jean-Paul Sartre

'It's a note...It says I.O.U. one pot of gold.'

"They've remained remarkably faithful to the text."

Lady of the bath...

"Your usually vicious sarcasm is weak. Go pump some irony."

Distractions Of The Great

Here be dragons.

"If you could be any Bob Dylan you wanted to, which Bob Dylan would you be?"

'Charlotte's Website' ('The children's book classic rewritten for the electronic era!')

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

Senta jumps into the sea

Iris Murdoch

Eagle (The Divine Comedy).

"I only like their bad albums – the good ones are too commercial."

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

"It that it? I don't have my contacts in."

The intellectual.

'Never mind singing it in rap... a simple 'I do' will suffice.'

"It's basically the 'Tragedy of King Lear' but with animated penguins."

"I don't care what you thought you saw,l there are no such things as people"

Thomas Hardy

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

"I understand the revisionists are hot on your trail, Professor Delauney."

Turning Japanese: I really think so.

"I miss the Augean stables."