Leader Of The Playground Gifts

'Let's play business. I'll be the chairman of the board and you'll work for me and laugh whenever I tell a joke.'

"My political platform focuses on more ice cream and more frisbee chasing, with less chores and fewer baths."

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

"I'm beginning to regret taking this job at the local playgroup."

"Go away, he's not done playing Cowboys and Indians yet."

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

"What colour do you have to get before the big kids leave you alone?"

"I'm bored."

A child sitting on a swing - while playing with a hand-held electronic device or phone

'Sure, I took your shovel. Ethics doesn't kick in for a year or two.'

"Recess does things to a man."

'I prefer the term 'whistleblower' to tattletale.'

"I'm doing whatever I feel like doing, before I reach the age of accountability."

Playground Pipe Dreams

'Don't let them know you're a prodigy. If they find out, they'll take away your teddy bear.'

"Do you want to talk about it?"

'Play post office? -- I don't like violent games.'

"Maths is easy because it's so logical. 2 + 2 obviously equals 22."

That kid's all business.

'They're relics of the many ancient civilization that have dwelled at Blisshaven.'

"It turns out I just wasted the whole morning networking with a dog."

"Ok, so I go back and forth… Then what?"

'Don't forget to take your tranquilizers Daddy, little Jimmy is coming round to play.'

'Not without your helmet, you're not!'

Dog Training.

'You put it down for five seconds. I get it now.'

'Well, I guess it's your father's fault for mounting that backboard on the barn in the first place. ... OK, one game...'

'I won't bother to bath Mum, we're playing again tomorrow!'

Mood swings: Swing 1 - 'Looks like it's going to be another wonderful day!' Swing 2 - 'Who CARES link brain! I hope it rains acid!!' Swing 3 - 'I think i'm going to CRRRY!'

'Oh,oh, Regina has her lawyer with her.'

"I'll wear any kind of dirt, but I prefer a rich loam with lots of humus."

"Oh, it's just more white-male stuff."

"He thinks he learned a new trick - I don't have the heart to tell him it's just an old trick he forgot he knew."

'I'm not making a mess, Mom -- I'm becoming one with the Earth!'

Riding the statue.