Law Show Aficionado Gifts

"I get all my life-critical data from TV."

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

Violent Crime Statistics

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

Lady Justice.

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

Pre-Minstrel Tension

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

"All I can figure is that he must have been inspecting the water quality of our lakes and rivers when he became entangled in cement."

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

Elon Musk in fly me to the moon

"Haven't you ever heard of the first amendment?"

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client blah blah...."

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

It Looks Like Trumpty Dumpty Got His Wall After All.

"Apparently, you have very little respect for our judicial system, sauntering in here with only one lawyer."

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to sue, and he'll eat for a lifetime."