Large Animal Vet Gifts

'I guess you might call it a sort of penicillin reaction.'

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

'Do you know a good way to stop a horse from chewing wood?'

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

"Congratulations! It's a bitch!"

Cat Scan

Dolphin

Committee On Feline Healthcare

'Ta dum deedee dum -- DUM -- Bloop -- Fsst, tra la,,,'

An inbred poodle.

Matador Artificial Insemination.

"Would you say the pain is more like a me-ow or a me-ouch?"

"Good news—it's not colon cancer, it's tinsel."

'YOU try telling him!'

"He's so old I usually let him do what he wants."

'Worst case of Prickly-Heat I've ever seen!'

A Few Common Ailments

"May I keep my collar on?"

'I don't set the rules, but you do need to accept that you're a pony and move on Brian!'

"In my practice, I prefer to treat the whole hog."

Desert Vet.

'Argh! This itching is driving me crazy!'

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

'Doc lost his new watch while checking old 32.'

"We had him neutered,"

Pork Sausage.

'The vet did it.'

"But You Knew I Was An Animal Doctor!"

'No, I'm sorry. I'm Doctor Ford and I do the large animal work....'

Vet checks fish's heartbeat with a stethoscope through fish bowl.

'What sort of mix is she?'

'Gee, Doctor Dresher, you have a wonderful way with horses....

"I'm their pet. They love me. They'll do anything for me. They cut my balls off."