Lab Experiment Enthusiast Gifts

'I sure wish there was a formula for picking the right mutual fund!'

A psychiatrist is at the end of the maze.

'So I left a little bit out of the genetic code when I cloned you. You're only missing a nose. What's the big deal?'

"I am not asking for directions."

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

'If he grabs the broccoli, we turn on the Raffi tunes. If he heads towards the Playstation, he hit him with the air horn at 100db.'

'Poor Kleinzweck -- his working hypothesis got laid off.'

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point.' Tennyson.'

Armstrong? Why did UPS just deliver a microscope, a robotic arm, a huge incubator, a nucleus extractor and a dozen lab rats? Well, it's certainly not so I can replace you with an army of clones programmed to work for free. Well

Wilhelm Rontgen's first attempt at X-rays: shining a bright light through Madame Rontgen.

'Let's agree to dispense with the rules of nomenclature and call it compound X.'

'How about a toast to my breakthrough?!'

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

Yeah, you're right. She's playing hard-to-get.

'We call it the 'Tomato Surprise' because the chef tinkered with the DNA a little.'

"Just a harmless little genetic experiment," they said. Yeah, right...

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point'. Tennyson.'

'Well, well - this should create a nice little wave of panic and hysteria.'

"If we crunch the numbers, it should have zero calories."

Plasma Ball

Miami Mice

Where did you learn alchemy? Elementary school.

'Isn't that a little extreme? - Cloning yourself just so you can use the carpool lane?'

'Think, son! What was that formula you fed that tree?!'

'I'm growing mini human brains from stem cells.'

It's an experiment.

'I don't KNOW what I'm doing -- this is pure research!'

'What'll I do with the nuclear wastes?'

An angry Scientist has discovered his two Lab' mice are using a GPS to find their way through a maze to some cheese.

"Essentially Wilkins proves things and Brenner disproves them."

'Okay I admit it - we probably do need a rocket scientist.'

Undercover Biophysicists

"But I'm conducting an experiment: will the twentieth cookie taste as good as the first?"

'Wow! Oh, wait -- It's only a Nobel consolation prize.'

"Say, do you have time between all that DNA research to invent a non-smelly sock."