Kitchen Fitter Gifts

'Job done son, a few corners slightly out of true but the customer will never notice.'

'What makes you think my kitchen was fitted by cowboys?'

'I'm counter - intelligence'

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

Counting ribs

Lady of the Cake.

Domestic Goddess.

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

Kitchen Kapers

Cake Friday!

"I just need help getting the pit out."

'Thanksgiving's no holiday for turkeys or the women who cook them.'

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

The Perfect Foil

'My brother's a proper cook - he's come as a witness'

Ghostbasters 3

Witch's Brew.

'Cooking'

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

"I'm just the bus boy but I'll be ignoring you also."

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

Chef copy robot

Mother to son, regarding stolen cake: 'I don't need to check anything with 'the boys in forensics' I know it was you.'

"This controls the speed, this opens the door and if you press the red button a maintenance man appears and gives you a very large bill"

'Shall we turn the extractor fan down a bit...?'

A chef teaches a classroom of other chefs how to properly flip something using a spatula.

"Do we really need the interactive garbage disposer?"

Gracious, child...bubbling cauldrons of potions are old hat. I get mine over the internet, delivered frozen and ready for the microwave!

"I got the part, but I play a waiter."

"My God!!..Just how long have we had this Broccoli hiding in the back of the fridge?"

Cookery Lesson.

'Harry won't even build me a new kitchen.'

The secret lives of household things.