Ketchup Connoisseurs Gifts

'Pass the ketch up dear.'

'Do you have any catsup?'

Flying sauces.

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

"It's been redacted to produce our sauces."

Woman watches football match played by a mug of tea, salt pot and ketchup bottle, she says to husband: 'Your explanation of the offside rule was spot on.'

'Oops! It's usually the devil to get any to come out!'

"You're really not too extreme, huh?"

"Ah — excellent catsup."

"It said on the packet the pasta should act as a vehicle for the sauce."

"Do you want ketchup on your steak too?"

Dave's Hamburger Shop

What's Their Secret?

'You've got to admit, Harvey, the barbecue sauce is REALLY hot down here!'

'I tell you what: Thank goodness for tomato sauce...'

"Tonight, we'll be eating hot dogs with a mustard-ketchup-and-pickle purée, accompanied by peas lightly sprinkled with ketchup. Then fettuccine al dente with a ketchup sauce, followed by applesauce maison with a dollop of you know what!"

'They send you into the ketchup department? HA! I'M going into pizza!'

Ketchup Kafe...Where Kondiment is King!

'Do you make fish cakes? It's his birthday!'

"Do you have to put tomato sauce on everything?"

"It turs out my milk is actually aging cream...so, I use it to remove all those ugly age spots."

'And for the Queen of Whiny Eaters, two pieces of bologna, cut into quarter-inch squares, coated with Abe's Barbecue Sauce...'

"As one of the best forwarders in the world you can sign any advertising contract you want, but..."

Sauce close to the PM.

"Heh, Trump likes his steaks well done with ketchup. Jesus."

Loyd Grossman

'Mmmm. How do you get the custard so creamy? You must give me the recipie!'

Outsaucing - A dollop of sauce has been put on a customer's plate from a long arm from afar.

'Crowd Source'

Maybe you would have less of a problem with flies in your soup if you didn't have landing strips attached to your bowls.

"Now dear...remember the sermon on PATIENCE..."

"Why, thank you, sweetheart!"

The cake diet.

'Ketchup? You know that's an insult to the chef, right?'

I love this age: Old enough to know better, young enough to get away with it. Ketchup.