Kale Enthusiasts Gifts

'Needs more kale.'

"I'm pleased to say our dishes all have too much kale."

"I say it's Kale, and I say it's spinaches shitfaced uncle."

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

Old sea captains queue to see Monster Whale Revenge.

"Matthew, did we agree to adopt a whale?"

'Did you hear that? They said 'Hello' to you.'

'What are you eating now?'

"Well did he?"

"See what happens when you go swimming after eating!"

"My mom is a vegetarian, so she doesn't bring home the bacon. She brings home kale and quinoa."

"Who's been nibbling at my kale house?"

'Is your cap on tight? We don't want any more accidents in the bed, do we?'

"I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you, Ahab!"

"We did it! Barbeque, bacon, cheese and just a twist of kale!"

'Doesn't seem right somehow-REAL ale in PLASTIC glasses!'

I can't believe I ate all that kale for nothing.

How Kale Took Over the World

"My trick for enjoying kale? I put in blueberries, a banana, a scoop of vanilla ice cream and ice. Then I throw the kale in the trash and blend."

'If you hire me, you'll get this lovely electrical water kettle for free!!'

Baby beluga, middle child beluga, firstborn beluga

Have A Whale Of A Christmas

'Dad, there's a whaler under my bed!'

Tall tales and Short stories

Signs that colas are making you fat. . .

"Why, of course I like Kale. It's the color of money."

"The idea is to start a little satellite program of our own...."

'I want to eat healthy food, but it takes green to eat green.'

"I work out so I don't have to eat kale."

"I have fun-size kale bars for those using recyclable bags."

"I'm looking for something that says, 'I'm sorry I bit off your leg.'"

"I didn't smoke, drank in moderation, exercised, ate kale, and yet, here I am."

Kid reading Tolstoy's 'War and Peace' as Dad brings in 'The Three Bears'.

Young Love/Elderly love.

"I wonder if we'll still have to eat kale this summer."