Justice Jammer Gifts

'He uses rim shots instead of banging on his gavel.'

"Well, that's the only song we know, so we can play it another two or three times, or we can cut our losses. Waddya say, Cleveland?"

Women's Martial Arts Center

Toothless Rocker, "Oi, play the guitar with your own teeth !"

Stop and Birch

Jeff Beck.

Guitarist: 'We can freely improvise some other time ... now let's practise.' (With Derek it was always jam tomorrow)

"People, the facts are inescapable. Any ideas on how we can ignore them?"

Bonita shows up late for the girls' Thursday night 'Jam Session'.

'Either it's a mistake, or this town's gone soft on crime.'

"Oops! My mistake, that was your projected trial load for this year, not this month."

Sloth traffic jam.

Around the piano

"Dude, I figured out why your solos sound so bad - that thing's actually a bass."

Air Sitar.

Two people play the guitar and harmonica.

"I wish I had done more pro bono work. I need the tax write offs."

"Shister and Shyster Attorneys at law"

'Without management consultants how is the NHS meant to instigate forward facing paradigm shifts in it's client nourishment product and policy integration strategisation?

Prosecutor's Office. The judge threw out the confession --- He said it was coerced. You violated the duress code!

'I'll never forget that day as long as I live. I was in court, delivering my final arguments in a pesky little environmental case, and I actually felt my conscience leave my body!'

Martial arts and clumsiness.

"As your attorney, Roger, I feel it's my duty to charge you an enormous amount of money."

"I never promised I would get you off. I alleged it."

Louie 'The Egg' Spignoli, The Hangman's Nightmare

'I like my plea bargain better. I plead guilty and you dismiss the charges.'

"Oh I never lose any sleep over my criminal cases. I figure that even if I lose, I'm not the one going to Jail!"

Swiss army justice.

'The Constitution guarantees you a speedy trial -- so hold on tight!'

'You say you saw my client do it. OK, but what if the jury doesn't believe you? Try to think outside the witness box.'

Santana Claus

The Jury Decides.

"It was 'im wot ruffled me bonce, judge, as I was politely getting into 'is car."

"I'm in the Bbm7 of my discontent."

'Nice! And what other interests do you have besides jamming?'