Judicial Worker Gifts

Adult Crime, Childish Thinking Time

Truth

'I got a suspended sentence.'

'It wasn't a hate crime, Your Honor — I actually kind of liked the guy.'

Antonin Scalia

"Miss Antonacci, please have a regular coffee and a cheese Danish remanded to my chambers."

Counsel's Opinion.

"Objections overruled...I also think the defendent looks extremly dodgy"

'I think you have figured out that, with today's overcrowded prisons, pleading insanity will put you back on the streets..."

'It doesn't matter if my client is guilty.. the book and movie deals are pouring in!'

Supremacist Court

"I don't plead."

Brett Kavanaugh Shows Why the US is the Bestest Country in the Whole Wide World

'...unfortunately for you, I only see things in black and white.'

"Objection over-ruled Counselor! Proceed to the clearly marked Fire Exit, if you follow my meaning."

'It's our prorogues gallery.'

The Lawyers who were told their hearings had been cancelled...again!

'Here's a toughie - does a public nuisance have a right of privacy?'

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten! (Published previously September 25, 2006.)

All together now! Let's sing our decision!

"My basic judicial philosophy is 'Guilty.'"

'If at first you don't succeed...appeal to a higher court.'

''Mobster'? -- I thought I agreed to testify against a lobster!'

"We all make mistakes, as Your Honor knows, having been twice reprimanded by the New York State Commission on Juridical Conduct."

"You want the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?" (Colour)

"Isn't it enough that I know the truth?"

A Judicial Error. (Judge has hit his thumb with his gavel.)

The hangman's badinage

Mitch McConnell's Impartial Justice

'Okay, the jury acquitted you, but I'm going to hold you five years for questioning.'

'Which one beats - a straight or a flush?'

'We find for the defendant, but we're really not too crazy about his claim.'

'We find the defendant to be TOAST.'

'There you go, bringing up the PAST again!'

"Don't tell me!...You're on the Jack Straw witness protection programme too."