Judicial Juggernaut Gifts

Sports Lawyers

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

"...but the big question is, does the competition know that we don't know what we don't know?"

"Better than a business model, I have a business scheme."

Ninedency: A budding tendency

That party went well.

Although not felt by everone, Wanda's powrful jargon sent seismic shock waves through some of the more geologically unstable department in the organization.

The Jose Padilla Experience

Stop and Birch

"What did you think of the encryption article?"

"This is gibberish, Nigel, but most persuasive gibberish."

Medieval headlines.

The Working Mum

"My wife's lawyer doesn't understand me."

"I'm afraid that due to a recent reorientation of forward facing customer resource functionality you're going to have to make the complaint to yourself... in triplicate."

Communication Breakdowns

'Hmmm...It is: innocent until proven guilty? Or is it: guilty until proven innocent?'

I called you to this synergistic ideation to strategize methods of creating new annoying words.

"Oops! My mistake, that was your projected trial load for this year, not this month."

'Tragically, Mr. Cornwell was unable to afford a personal ethicist.'

'You reckon we should mosey this guy?'

"I wish I had done more pro bono work. I need the tax write offs."

"Shister and Shyster Attorneys at law"

"I've given you a glowing reference, Hempson. And here's the disclaimer to go with it."

'I'm more unpopular now than I was at school.'

"As your attorney, Roger, I feel it's my duty to charge you an enormous amount of money."

"I never promised I would get you off. I alleged it."

'Finally some good news on the economy: four out of five economists agree that 80% if economists agree.'

It's folks like Mildred who make collectibles collectable!

"In a nutshell, my career goal is to nurture my unique personhood in a culturally diverse, progressive business environment, while also honoring the traditional values of back-stabbing, greed and global plundering!"

"Oh I never lose any sleep over my criminal cases. I figure that even if I lose, I'm not the one going to Jail!"

'I may not know much about art but I know what I like to slag off.'

Swiss army justice.

'I like my plea bargain better. I plead guilty and you dismiss the charges.'

'The Constitution guarantees you a speedy trial -- so hold on tight!'