Jovial Germaphobes Pillows

'Stan, you can still pick up that food! Due to the economy, the five second rule had been modified to eight seconds.'

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

The new normal

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

'Let me guess...it's contagious!'

'Gesundheit.'

Superbug Research Go For It / Got it

Wash your hands

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about lyme disease."

'I hope what I have isn't catching.'

'I cause sneezes.' 'I cause fever' 'I cause that 'I don't know- I just don't feel too good' feeling.'

"No Hand Sanitiser"

"Hey!-This looks like a good place!"

"Well, okay I'll eat it. But, only if you have a medical team on stand by."

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

"The penicillin looks good."

A mosquito cleaning the surface of a person's arm before sucking out the blood.

ABC Vice Company: Employees Must Squash Hands Before Returning to Work

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

Soap Versus Coronavirus

'...and I'm telling you that Budgie sneezed!!'

"Maybe a little inconvenient, but not a single case of the flu in the entire office."

'That stuff kills 98% of household germs, but leaves the remaining 2% limping around enough to maintain your resistance.'

'We've got a new DNA database...'

Want to hear a secret? Every time they put a nut in my mouth, I give it a little lick.

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

Yellow Fever: What you may catch if your painter sneezes.

'I'm afraid you've got a computer virus.'

Shaking hands will transfer bacteria

'Colds! Sore throats! Flue! Did anyone ever tell you you're a hypochondriac?'

"Hypochondriac's handbook. A little passion project I'm working on;, or, rather, I would be working on."

'I know it's not around too much this season but I think I have swine flu!'

"Aways the victim."

"Think it can last 20 seconds this time?"