Joking Son Gifts

'Thanks for the drink, Dad - I'd give you a tip, but I don't get enough pocket money!'

'Surely you wouldn't want me to laugh at your joke if I didn't think it was funny!'

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

Sure, he likes it here - he's a cartoonist.

'This is the only part of my old Army uniform that still fits.'

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

'Who folded the annual report into a paper airplane?'

"I want to dispel the rumor that this redistricting map was drawn by my toddler on an Etch-A-Sketch. . .I'd never met that toddler before."

Get crazy once in a while

"I brought you a wig because you said you like long hair."

"I'm giving you a 300% salary increase, and four months paid leave."

"Just toot my horn and I'll be there."

'Our family has a dry sense of humor, and we don't laugh that much.'

Wet Cement. Always the joker, aren't you, Ernie?

Signs of Aging: Light headedness, shortening, waxy skin, burn out and hot flashes.

Caution May Contain Nuts.

Pesky students.

'You're one of my kids? Really? I'm so sorry, I have so many it's hard to remember them all...'

'That's her second pitcher and she doesn't even like beer - I guess she just likes to pee.'

'You've got the wrong idiot, number.'

'Just remember, he's bigger, but you're funnier. As soon as he starts laughing, you've got him!'

"You've got to be kidding me." Hoover Dam

"So yeah - This is my ideal first date."

'A boy at school was named after his father. They've called him Dad.'

'Half o' mild and a bag of pork scratchings - you're grooming me, aren't you?'

Bottle-nosed Dolphins.

'Now listen: The big hairy ones are the hunters, while the smaller ones with long hair are the gatherers...'

A Young Boy Talking To An Old Gentleman.

Giraffe wanders into Lion country.

Extremely Practical Jokes.

'It's either a boo-boo or an owwie, but the doctors need to run some more tests before they decide.'

Bishop has his robes stuck in his pants.

"The witness will confine his 'Knock knock' answers to 'Who's there?'"

"Sometime I feel people go out of their way just to scare me."

'How's daddy's little deductions doing?'