Joker In Love Pillows

Immature, taunting husband.

Missing Persons...'I'm not sure when she disappeared - sometime during the football season.'

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

Get crazy once in a while

"Mating dance? Good luck with that. I couldn't even get my husband to do the chicken dance at our wedding."

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

"Would you rather get hit by a racket or chewed by a dog?"

"April Fools'! You should’ve seen the look on your face!"

"You look so beautiful, glistening in the moonlight."

'Hey, Baby! How would you like to kiss the frog formerly known as 'Prince'?'

'Want to freak her out? Stare over her shoulder without blinking for 10 minutes.'

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

'...And do you John take Jennifer to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold, to write off on your taxes?'

'When she walks in she lights up the room...' 'It's living next to the nuclear plant.'

Well, she certainly is one of our more positive employees!

It's not what's outside that interests me. It's what's inside!

"Whenever it comes, Glenda, my death will be untimely."

'Half o' mild and a bag of pork scratchings - you're grooming me, aren't you?'

Never pick a fight with a comedian.

'I love it when you say - 'I'm going to print money'.'

'I ask myself-do I really want to sleep on the edge of the bed again?'

'I've heard all about you. Jayne says you're quite the prankster.'

"I'll give you a big wet kiss.. "

See, Bill? They DID remember us this Valentine's Day!

Face Mask Romance

"Harold, stop sucking in your stomach when the girls walk by. You're going to hurt yourself."

Sunshine and exercise. Are you glad I suggested we go for a walk?

'Moses, you'd better be in that bathtub!!'

Man playing with echos: 'Hellooooo...How are you....I love you...' 'I'm not ready for that kind of committment!'

"....'Sickness, health? ... better, worse... richer, poorer?'... how about leaving me some wiggle room!"

"It's me, Lucky—you can drop the best-friend shtick."

Wordplay: Mandate - Escort Agency.

'I wish you wouldn't bring work home with you!'

"What do you mean, you 'feel funny'?"

"We could have a shoot-out, then brunch."