Joke-loving Gourmand Pillows

'I didn't say your meal wouldn't contain fat. I said the fat would be free.'

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

"I remember his last words were, 'Another bite and I'll burst!'..."

'Lets all thank Martha for her very innovative 'Hot Dog Crepes'.'

"We need a new stove. This one's beginning to burn oil."

'Sorry to keep you waiting, sir.'

'No, you can't complain to the waiter about the vegetables floating in your soup. It's vegetable soup!'

'Todays special - egg on Ronay'

"Waiter! - this soup tastes funny!"

The mushroom pickers

"Rare, medium or well done?"

Damaged goods & lawyer's torts 50 off.

'No, I don't have a favorite. Dung is dung.'

"What will change my life?"

Those who bought my cookbook with the transposed pages will get a refund. Those who actually enjoy Lobster Alfredo a la mode - bon app

"Some volcano roll!"

The Puffin Restaurant: Today's special - regurgitated sand eels

Chef and restaurant patrons waiting outside clinic.

Holy Pizza

"Take Away Food" tramp waiting round corner to pounce

Christmas canape?

Boiling Point

House of Beans.

"Putting a steak, chicken wings and potato chips on a salad kind of negates the eating healthy concept."

"I no longer have the intestinal fortitude for street food."

Man eating a bad oyster

"That was the last of the O-negative."

'His snacks and his meals are beginning to OVERLAP!'

Fast Food

'What...and you take the plunge to call this a gourmet restaurant??!'

'Bad news... all our tests came back with you as delicious.'

Compliments to the chef.

'You will eat a fortune cookie very soon.'