Jogging Jester Gifts

You know, doc, I exercise every morning. I'm always running late!

"Oh my God, do I really look like that when I'm running."

Medical advice for runners road signs.

"I paid three grand for this dress- I'll wear it wherever I want!"

'If I jog backwards,will I gain weight?'

A woman takes a pterodactyl on a run.

"My fitness app programmed that dollar to keep him running."

Ophidiophobic Society 10k Run.

Women in a cross country race

'I'm reduced to having to jog to get exercise: The farmer has clipped my wings...'

'I bet he can run twice as fast as you can.' 'But he has twice as many legs!'

Shin splints. Next 5 miles.

Just for laughs, let's throw a few folks off course.

Second wind.

"I told him that blogging when on a run was a bad idea!"

'Hang on Jesse! You're being dragged into the jogger's vortex!'

"You can't compare apples and oranges because oranges have longer legs."

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

Banana Split...

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

"Not guilty but prepared to settle out of court, your honour."

Dog fetching clown shoes.

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

'Your Honor, in order to avoid being sued, we find the defendant 'Not guilty.''

'Can I sue someone because I didn't win my lawsuit?'

"#notguilty."

Jogging Bottoms

Beer Order

'This court finds you guilty Mr. Jones. As your punishment, the bailiff here will slug you one.'

"Wheeeeeeee!"

'Honestly, dear, I'm just giving my pedometer a rest.'