Marathon Jester Gifts

"Arlen keeps bragging about running 26 miles. What he fails to tell people is that it took him eight months to do it."

"We're following Carrot Top."

"You can't compare apples and oranges because oranges have longer legs."

Beer Order

Women in a cross country race

A woman takes a pterodactyl on a run.

Stepping on clown's shoe...

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

'Anybody for breakfast?'

"We can give you enough medication to alleviate the pain, but not enough to make it fun."

Ski kicker.

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

'Make sport of the Queen.'

'I'm looking for someone who can make me laugh.'

'Sorry, but we can't serve you the grande size anymore without a prescription.'

Travelling jesters. No fools left aboard overnight.

'Ringing in your ears, you say?'

Show Jumping Tantrums

'I told the jester he could take April Fool's Day off.'

'Let him go. We'll catch him in the backstretch. Hippos can run faster than humans, but only in short bursts.'

Never poke fun.

'From left to right: witchfinder general, jester jocular and spouse peculiar.'

'I hate these commerical breaks!'

I'm trying to figure out what drives you... A new company car would be nice.

'This decaf's lousy.'

'Just a minute, I forgot something.'

Rugby oldies

'I like the way you tick, Watkins!'

King and clown engage in role reversal.

'I bet he can run twice as fast as you can.' 'But he has twice as many legs!'

"Must be the life to work in a castle. You get paid by a rich king and you don’t have to go through every shift smelling elephant butt."

"Work's been really hard."

'Do something else - I don't like irony.'