Job Seeker Enthusiast Gifts

'I'm sorry,but the only person Mr McCoy is looking to hire right now is a good criminal defense lawyer. But I'll be happy to pass your resume on to him.'

'I looked over your resume, and the good news is I like the paper it's typed on. Do you really want to know the bad news?'

'I'm looking over your resum?, there is one opening we have for you.'

"We're looking for someone exactly like you."

"Being that there is a zillion job openings, I am hopeful of getting a job real quick!"

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

'Your resume is a little thin, but I like your willingness to be manipulated by upper management.'

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

The Three Wise Queens

"He might not have got the job with Google, but they weren't going to stop Brian skateboarding to the office."

"There are no big jobs, only small machines."

'Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade.'

PERSONNEL, 'Why did you leave your previous employment?', 'They asked too many questions!'

"I love you in a suit. You look so... employed."

'You say you were King of the Jungle, but it seems your experience is mainly in savannah grassland...'

How are you at decision making?

'A depressing thought just came over me. Now we'll have to go out and get a job!'

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

"Don't get the wrong idea about those years in a mental institution. I was employed there."

Do you have any other skills?

"I don't like your application."

'A short economics test - if you bought something for

You're next, Mr. Kimble - right after his apple danish.

"I'd like to TikTok your offer and get comments before saying yes or no."

In and Out Sourced.

Between Offices

'Don't start timing me yet! This staple won't come out!'

'Do you do self-deprecating humour?'

'Someone important is bound to see my resume now!'

"We offer 104 vacation days...otherwise known as weekends."

"Can I multi-task? As a single mom I'm both the bread-winner and bread-baker!"

'Now, remember...let me do the talking.'