Job Hunting Adventurers Gifts

"Sorry...right out of coastguard jobs at the moment. Not even one on the horizon."

'I have this fear of the real world...'

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

'What do you mean, you're tired of the rat race?'

'Think of this as a window of opportunity.'

Prospective hospital employee: 'I do sutures. Are there any openings?'

"What's your occupation?"

Corporate Ladder and Corporate Elevator

"Are you willing to work the night shift?"

"Would you like something you're under qualified for, or something you're overqualified for?"

"The labor market is awaiting you!"

"I guess I'll see you around Frank."

Now hiring.

'You're hired. Go figure.'

'Sometimes I think about getting away from all this and get a job as a cab driver in New York city...'

'I hear you're looking for bounty hunters...'

"You've been working out of your parent's basement since 1993?"

"...and before that, I was an embryo."

'Mr. Whipple, what other qualifications do you have - apart from your quite excellent Donald Duck impression?'

Job hoppers.

We don't have a budget to redo the last guy's business cards, door placard, and so on, so would you mind assuming his identity in the meantime?

"On your application it says you've been a circus clown, an orthopaedic surgeon and a molecular biologist."

'Running away from the circus to join the world of accountancy isn't working out as I expected. . .'

Multi-Species Employment Agency. Did you hire the octopus for that job opening? Yeah, but I did interview other applicants. The frog was a strong candidate. I'm flexible on location - I'm an amphibian! The whale seemed to be hiding something. The gap in my resume? Uh ... I was beached for a while. And the pig wasn't smart. I see "USDA Approved" on your resume. I don't think you understand what that mwans. The octopus got the job because he's a great multitasker!

'Refusing to fill in a psychometric test reveals a lot about you, Jones.'

'After graduation, I plan on working in warrantless surveillance for the CIA. How about you?'

"If you work hard enough, and find the right reality show, you can grow up to be anything you want."

'Guess what, I got a job tallying bananas.'

"A High-Pain Job? Yes, I believe we have that."

"I'd like to be the first to welcome you to our company. But, I've decided not to hire you."

'I guess I don't need to tell you that you got the job.'

Oxford Circus

'I'd love to have whatever job you have left.'

'I always said he was on the fast track.'

Lew Yomp Jr: Investment Counselor & Elvis Look Alike.