Job Hunt Adventurer Gifts

'I'm sorry, but we are after a different kind of Web expert...'

"Now that the interview process is over, we require that you don't apply anywhere else for 5 years until we make our decision."

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

'What do you mean, you're tired of the rat race?'

'Think of this as a window of opportunity.'

Prospective hospital employee: 'I do sutures. Are there any openings?'

"What's your occupation?"

"Would you like something you're under qualified for, or something you're overqualified for?"

"The labor market is awaiting you!"

"I guess I'll see you around Frank."

'You're hired. Go figure.'

'Sometimes I think about getting away from all this and get a job as a cab driver in New York city...'

"You've been working out of your parent's basement since 1993?"

'Running away from the circus to join the world of accountancy isn't working out as I expected. . .'

'I hear you're looking for bounty hunters...'

Job hoppers.

'Mr. Whipple, what other qualifications do you have - apart from your quite excellent Donald Duck impression?'

We don't have a budget to redo the last guy's business cards, door placard, and so on, so would you mind assuming his identity in the meantime?

"...and before that, I was an embryo."

"On your application it says you've been a circus clown, an orthopaedic surgeon and a molecular biologist."

'Refusing to fill in a psychometric test reveals a lot about you, Jones.'

'After graduation, I plan on working in warrantless surveillance for the CIA. How about you?'

'I guess I don't need to tell you that you got the job.'

"If you work hard enough, and find the right reality show, you can grow up to be anything you want."

"I'd like to be the first to welcome you to our company. But, I've decided not to hire you."

"A High-Pain Job? Yes, I believe we have that."

'I always said he was on the fast track.'

'I'd love to have whatever job you have left.'

'Guess what, I got a job tallying bananas.'

Oxford Circus

"Where do you see yourself in five years?"

'You were in commodities - cattle, stuff like that - so you must feel right at home here.'

'I wonder if I should add this to my resume.'