Job Hunt Adventurer T-Shirts

'I'm sorry, but we are after a different kind of Web expert...'

"Now that the interview process is over, we require that you don't apply anywhere else for 5 years until we make our decision."

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

'Think of this as a window of opportunity.'

'What do you mean, you're tired of the rat race?'

Prospective hospital employee: 'I do sutures. Are there any openings?'

"What's your occupation?"

Corporate Ladder and Corporate Elevator

"Would you like something you're under qualified for, or something you're overqualified for?"

"The labor market is awaiting you!"

"I guess I'll see you around Frank."

Now hiring.

'You're hired. Go figure.'

We don't have a budget to redo the last guy's business cards, door placard, and so on, so would you mind assuming his identity in the meantime?

Job hoppers.

'I hear you're looking for bounty hunters...'

"On your application it says you've been a circus clown, an orthopaedic surgeon and a molecular biologist."

'Running away from the circus to join the world of accountancy isn't working out as I expected. . .'

"You've been working out of your parent's basement since 1993?"

'Mr. Whipple, what other qualifications do you have - apart from your quite excellent Donald Duck impression?'

"...and before that, I was an embryo."

'Sometimes I think about getting away from all this and get a job as a cab driver in New York city...'

'Refusing to fill in a psychometric test reveals a lot about you, Jones.'

'After graduation, I plan on working in warrantless surveillance for the CIA. How about you?'

'Guess what, I got a job tallying bananas.'

Lew Yomp Jr: Investment Counselor & Elvis Look Alike.

Oxford Circus

"I'd like to be the first to welcome you to our company. But, I've decided not to hire you."

"A High-Pain Job? Yes, I believe we have that."

'I always said he was on the fast track.'

'I'd love to have whatever job you have left.'

"If you work hard enough, and find the right reality show, you can grow up to be anything you want."

'I guess I don't need to tell you that you got the job.'

"Where do you see yourself in five years?"