New Job Adventurer T-Shirts

Janitor on the Job Training.

'I have this fear of the real world...'

"It's clear to me that you want to go far with this company."

"I caution everyone to avoid taking the first field reporter job that comes along."

"I figure if I was still employed, I wouldn’t get to spend all this time with you!"

The number one injury in today's workplace: severe bends caused by repeated exposure to deep-dive presentations.

Five doors: Push, Pull, Up High, Down Low, Too Slow.

'What do you mean, you're tired of the rat race?'

'Think of this as a window of opportunity.'

Prospective hospital employee: 'I do sutures. Are there any openings?'

You are here.

'He's been brought in to save the company.'

STRIP Hambone: Workers help is a hindrance

"We've developed a five year plan that includes ample provisions for another five year plan if this one doesn't work."

Corporate Ladder and Corporate Elevator

Free Range Employees.

"What's your occupation?"

Responsibility and duties

"I've just about had it with these corporate retreats!"

"To think—this meeting, which turned into the perfect day, filled with spontaneous adventures that will become priceless memories, could have been an e-mail."

"If the meeting goes on for longer than scheuled...I'm prepared!"

Whack, Out of Whack.

"Would you like something you're under qualified for, or something you're overqualified for?"

Office Park

"The labor market is awaiting you!"

"I guess I'll see you around Frank."

Now hiring.

John couldn't help but think that his team had a different perspective on the event than he did...

'Welcome to Change Management 101. We'll start with some free falls.'

"it appears I'm being relocated"

'You're hired. Go figure.'

"Your Easter bonuses are hidden throughout corporate headquarters."

"I see you've come a long way, Perkins."

Careerist

'Sometimes I think about getting away from all this and get a job as a cab driver in New York city...'